It's been a little over a year since we've been engaged and I'm a really blessed girl. I've got a great fiance, great friends and my family is numero uno. In the beginning of wedding planning I was OCD about everything. I must have this done now, I need to do that soon etc... I thought I had things under control but in reality I felt like I was falling apart.

I had some people complain to me about not being involved with the wedding and guilt tripping me. Which I could handle at first. Then I get constant guilt tripping and I fell apart and cried. Then I had some people who wanted to invite their in laws to the wedding (whom I've never met) and I thought I was going nuts! I was so overwhelmed with people telling me what I should or shouldn't be doing or what people didn't like about the location or whatever else.... I ended up getting really upset.

So I stopped writing on Weddingbee not because I didn't want to share our wedding planning but because I was really stressed and put most of the wedding planning aside. I wanted the focus to be off the details of the wedding and wanted to emphasize relationships. Instead of eagerly deciding what flowers or centerpieces I should have... I had our wedding party over for a wine tasting and it truly made me smile. Instead of racking my brain over the cost of the wedding, I had some friends come over for dinner and sure... we talked about the wedding but we just enjoyed each other's company.

It's been working. I feel like I'm more connected with my friends and much more happier. Although the stress is still there, I can handle it much better because I don't feel like I'm at it alone. I admire you ladies who can plan everything down to the smallest things and I wish I were that organized but I'm not. Now I'm looking forward to the wedding and getting back to the planning, don't worry most of the major details are worked out. So hopefully this means Miss Poppy will be back more often - sharing with you things you probably know already.

I do hope that not too many brides have been as stressed as I have been the past couple months. But if you are - know that you're not alone and remember that the day is about you and your fiance. If the relationship is wonderful then your wedding is already a success! I know ours is and if things don't go exactly the way I planned - I'm okay with that because I'll already have everything I need at the wedding: My fiance, my family and my friends.

I've been talking to my sister, who is also my maid of honour about the bridal shower that's coming up in a little over a month about themes. We were debating since I don't need things for the home like kitchenware or anything else since we had a house warmning a little after we moved in. Then while browsing a couple themes we loved the "Honeymomon at Home".

Here's a excerpt of someone who had it before: "

On the theme of winter weddings, I found these adorable things that are perfect for winter weddings:

myweddingfavors.com

 momentsofelegance.com

americanbridal.com

traftons chocolates

I wrote this on my personal blog but snowflakes are one of my favourite things! (Like the song from "Sound of music": "Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes...") If you want to visit the online stores just click on the pictures and it'll take you directly to the site! Enjoy~

Now that it's snowing like crazy in NYC, I wish that my wedding was during the snow than the heat of July. It's just so pretty but then again I know I'd be freezing. Those of you having a winter wedding, take lots of pictures outside I'd love to see them.

How many of you are getting married this month? Is it snowing where you are too?

Remember Mrs. Bee talking about those adorable Hersey Kiss stamps? Well little old me went over to the post office today and bought their remaining 6 sheets. I put them on the rsvp envelopes and they are so cute! My invitations need a stamp that is 63 cents. I don't know of any cute stamps that are that amount.. should I just put two Hersey Kiss stamps instead? Although that is a waste of money but they are SO CUTE!

I've been researching some place holders and I found such a cute one.

from: myweddingfavors.com

I think it's a really cute alternative especially those brides in Feb. Even though ours is in July, I'm really tempted to buy these. Would it be weird if I did? Ah, who cares right? Just as long as I like it

I would love to hear where you ladies are getting your place cards... Please let me know, I'm still searching.

As many of you know I'm Korean with a dash of Japanese in me. Mr Poppy is Chinese-Hong Kongese? My inlaws are here from HK and when they came they brought many gifts for their "daughter"... *ahem* that would be me.

All the gifts were wonderful and I loved them all. But my favourite was the jade necklace that Mr Poppy's mother gave me. This is not just any jade necklace, this jade was passed down by her mother and her mother's mother. I was so unbelievably honoured and I felt so special! She even had the yellow gold chain and the part that holds the jade replaced with white gold. Then she had the jade special made with diamonds on it. She made it that way because she wanted it so that "a young girl could easily wear it now a days".

I put it on and the whole family was smiling ear to ear. I felt truly loved, I felt like a daughter... I am their daughter. And when we have children - I too will pass down this jade to my little girl. The thought of this jade being passed down generation to generation makes me very proud. Especially since I am told that as you wear the jade more, the darker it gets. (It's already beautiful but imagine it 5 girls down the road!)

Do you have something from your inlaws that have been passed down from older generations also? And if so, will you keep passing it down?

Even though they tell me I don't have to wear it everyday.... I do. Not because I have to but because I love them.

The good news is that the invitations are all ready to go and the only thing left before sending them is to include hotel information and a map of where it is along with the ceremony/reception location. I called up quite a few hotels inquiring about blocking sleeping rooms and most of them make you sign a contract making us responsible for filling 80% of the rooms or we pay for the unaccounted rooms. This freaks me out a little bit since I'm not even sure all of our out of town guests will stay in the hotel that we pick. What is the general rule as far as how many rooms you should block off?

I tried picking a location where it's easily accessible for public transportation and I've been trying to keep it near the theater district or hearld square. The theater district for most of my guests since they are musicians and hearld square since Koreatown is there, along with the world's largest Macy's. I haven't had any luck as far as figuring out how to go about finding hotels but all I can really do is call right?

I'd love to hear about how you ladies are going about finding a hotel for your guests. Will you have transportation to and from the wedding for your guests? We're thinking about renting a shuttle bus so that it's easy for our non-New York City guests and ensure they will be on time for our wedding.

The best part about the hotel planning is that I'm bonding with my father in law who is staying with us (along with my mother in law) for about a month. He's so excited to help and has great insight to these aspects of the wedding that I have no idea about!

This is totally off topic but who is excited about the weddingbee gathering in Feb?

I AM!

Mr. Poppy and I are doing a premarital counseling thing with our wonderful officiant/pastor since we've been engaged. The first thing that was recommended was a book entitled: "The Five Love Languages: How to express heartfelt commitment to your mate" by Gary Chapman. I am not one that likes reading books that are sort of along the self help line but I have to say that this book changed my whole outlook on relationships.

The book talks about how there are five primary love languages and that each of us has our own "language". It goes on to explain in depth about the five languages: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service and physical touch. The interesting thing is that Chapman goes on to explain that sometimes we try to show our love in our primary love language and we wonder why our spouse doesn't appreciate or feel loved. Unless your significant other speaks the same primary language, he's not going to know.

I love how this book says that love is not a magical thing, it is a choice. You choose to love someone, you also choose to show that love. After reading this book I realise that my fiance and I do speak in each other's love language and we feel more than loved already. But this book actually really brought perspective in my other relationships with people and made me realise that some friends I wasn't speaking their primary love language. While I was reading I was thinking in my head: "Oh Sarah's love language isn't 'receiving gifts' but it's 'words of affirmation'!" or "Oh, all this time I was spending 'quality time' with my mother when she really feels loved by 'acts of service'".

Now I know that I'm being very vague with what exactly these five languages are... But I promise that it will really make you think about how to make your husband and others feel truly loved. Although this book is geared towards Christians, I find that it's very minimal with the Christian talk and more in depth about how to approach relationships.

If any of you have read it, please do share! I'd love to hear about it. Those that haven't read it, please give it a try. I know that it inspired me - and I don't usually get this way about books.

EDIT:
oops i mistook the rsvp price! it was only $12.95 for 32 cards and envelopes so that comes out to 31 cents a card! WOOT!

My invitations are in and it was fun putting them together with my Mother in Law and my sister. The kit came with the back card, ribbon, the actual invitation and envelopes. They provided glue dots to attach everything and although none of them are perfectly centered, know that we made them with love and lots of laughter! Oh I almost forgot - Mr. Poppy made some too!

I can't figure out for the life of me how to take pictures clearly but the only good that came out of this is that I don't think I have to blur out anything. What do you guys think? In person they are much prettier, but like I said - I am no photographer.

I also made RSVP cards:

 
top - envelope, bottom closed card; opened card

I bought these fold cards from Barnes and Noble for super cheap. I think under 50 cents per card. They are glittery and beautiful hand made paper. Since they came blank I just insereted them to my inkjet printer and made the RSVPs that way! Everything about our wedding have been very hands on and I like that almost everything was something special from our families to our guests.

So... what do you ladies think? You like? I like it a lot but I love the time I got to bond with my Mother in Law and sister most of all.

I promise more updates to come. I miss you ladies!

I've been very fortunate with all the things that have been in my life as far as my professional and love life. I got news a couple days ago that I was accepted into a early professorship, where I will be teaching masters students next year under the title of Ph.d. My love life is the best it could ever be, loving fiance who supports me in every which way.

I met my inlaws last summer when they flew in from Hong Kong to New York. They are probably the world's nicest inlaws. The only barrier that we really had was the language. They speak Cantonese and Madarin and I speak: Korean, Italian, French, Spanish and Japanese (For my Grandmother's side). Even though their English is not bad at all, there were a few moments of: "Huh?". The Cantonese that I learned on CDs helped but not enough for me to converse to the point of complete understanding.

After they left I continued the Cantonese CDs, talked with my Chinese friends whenever I could with them correcting me or praising me. I feel pretty comfortable with listening now and basic conversation. Now I can go to Chinatown and actually ask them where things are, how much things are and things of that sort.

But last night put the biggest grin on my face when talking to my mother-in-law. She has been learning Korean online and tried out so many phrases on me and we giggled and laughed. At times she forgot what things meant and asked my fiance and I what it means. When I told her what it meant, I didn't even realized I was explaining in Cantonese! We were both so happy to communicate in Canto-Korean. I couldn't believe it at all, we were talking for over an hour and having so much fun and actually understanding one another.

Like I said, I've been really fortunate and this Thanksgiving season there were many things I was thankful for. But this particular Thanksgiving I'm thankful for having two moms. Twice the love, for one daughter in particular.